Anthropomorphism means to attribute human characteristics to non-human things..to make them come alive! Another common word for it is personification.

Being externally motivated by contact, Rebel phase persons are looking for energy, life, and active interaction with their world. So as a supervisor, parent, teacher, or friend, why not help make their world “come alive?!” A classic example that PCM trainers will recognize is the “Rebel Shoe Demonstration.” The Rebel is motivated to “clean up,” by reuniting the long-lost shoe with it’s lonely mate.

Making non-human objects “come alive” helps the Rebel interact with them in more creative and productive ways. Instead of saying, “The files are piling up on your desk, Robert. Time to get to work,” try, “I walked past your office and the file on the bottom of your pile yelled at me that he was squished.” Instead of saying to your child, “Honey, the dishwasher really needs to be run and it’s your job,” try, “Did you hear that team fungus beat team mold in the dingy dishwasher showdown last night? Luckily only 5 plates were injured during the post-game party.” When the task comes alive for the Rebel, it’s more likely to get done.

Anthropomorphism is an effective technique for inviting Rebel phase persons out of distress as well. Recently when my Rebel daughter continued to ignore and defy my requests to stop bouncing the soccer ball in the house, I took the ball away and put it in “time out” on a shelf. I also had a little “chat” with the ball explaining the dangers of inside play. Periodically I would walk past the shelf and check in to see if the soccer ball needed a drink. When time-out was over, my daughter happily put the ball away.

Adult Rebel distress might sound like this. “I would have been on time but the train made me late.” (Rebel Blamer Mask). Response: “Funny thing..the train called me today to ask when you’d be coming to work so she could plan a sneak attack. Next time I’ll pretend I don’t know.”

How are you using anthropomorphizing to make things come alive for Rebels in your life? We’d love to hear about your experiences.

The Unanswerable Question

Asking long, complicated, multi-tiered questions, e.g. “Why, having considered the evidence, do you believe this is the right course of action, and what do you plan to do or say about it?”  Or asking the short and impossible question, e.g. “Why, exactly, did you say that?”

The Back Door

Fishing for “the right answer” without being direct, e.g. “Don’t you think we should stop now?” Most “questions” that begin with a negative (e.g. Don’t, Wouldn’t, Shouldn’t, Isn’t) are Be Perfect for Me drivers.

The Observation

Noticing what’s wrong instead of what’s right, what’s missing instead of what’s present, e.g. “You missed a spot.”  Or “I noticed you got a third cup of coffee.”

Do these fit with your experience?  Are they consistent with your understanding?  Are there additional categories?

Reactors need recognition of person and sensory.  As a Reactor at work, these needs can be met through SNS.  If they are not getting met by their supervisor, peers, or in the work environment, then a Reactor will be drawn to SNS during the work day.  This is not a bad thing because it elevates mood and meets their needs.

Also, SNS is an extension of pictures of family and friends in their work space.  Those times in the day when they are tweeting, poking or posting, may be a time when they are rejuvenating themselves.  This could be a great gift that they are giving to their organization.

For Rebels, the same concept, except they need playful contact.  What better way to do that then SNS?  Many organizations don’t want or accept playful contact.  As a Rebel if I am taking time to tweet, post an update, or play Angry Birds, I am rejuvenating and energizing myself.  After a do a bit of SNS, I am a more productive employee.

This said, Reactors and Rebels are still to be held accountable.  They must meet work productivity requirements.  The big question is: If they (Reactors and Rebels) are productive do we care if they participate in SNS?

“Some entrepreneurs undertake ventures at long odds. They back high-risk business ideas either because they are in denial about the hazards or because they are emotionally committed to the project. Gamblers wager because they feel lucky, for escapism, for entertainment, or because they lack the power to stop. The motivations are rather different.”  Link to the full article by clicking here.

(Disclaimer: Unless you already have a subscription to the Financial Times, you will have to sign-up for a free 4-week on-line subscription to read this.  Our apologies for this inconvenience.)

In this TED talk (shared with us from one of our favorite Dreamer-base friends), Susan Cain talks about the changes in our culture toward “group think” and extroversion being a preferred way of being.  She challenges us to consider that the best ideas often come from a place of quiet introspection, not groups – where the most charismatic speaker in the room is likely to have the most influence.  Cain shares, “there is no correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas.”

The Power of Introverts

The Process Therapy Model has strong theoretical foundations in the work of Jung, Berne and Erickson, and has been used successfully by practitioners to refine diagnoses, direct treatment, and improve patient outcomes across the world.  Dr. Paul Ware, retired chair, department of Psychiatry at Louisiana State University Medical Center, was a close collaborator with Dr. Kahler, and contributed significantly to the application of PTM to psychosocial treatment of mental disorders.  In 2006 Dr. Ware was recognized by the American Psychiatric Association as their teaching physician of the year.

My experience and research has convinced me that PTM is a model that simultaneously supports the positive aspects of the Medical Model, builds a bridge to transcend outdated assumptions and knowledge, supports current best practices in behavioral health treatment, and suggests bold new directions for the future.

The following definition of Medical Model is taken from thefreedictionary.com:

“The traditional approach to the diagnosis and treatment of illness as practiced by physicians in the Western world since the time of Koch and Pasteur.  The physician focuses on the defect, or dysfunction, within the patient, using a problem-solving approach.  The medical history, physical examination, and diagnostic tests provide the basis for the identification and treatment of a specific illness.”

The Medical Model has come under fire in the past 15 years for being reductionistic, dualistic, and pathologizing, putting too much power in the hands of psychiatrists, and padding the pockets of pharmaceutical companies.  At it’s best the Medical Model adheres to the scientific method of problem-solving and hypothesis testing, and in the hands of compassionate providers who appreciate the patient’s role in outcomes, it can be a beneficial framework.

For those unfamiliar with PTM, I will outline how it supports the Medical Model.  Those wanting additional background are directed to Kaher’s book, Process Therapy Model (Kahler Communications Inc., 2008).  Let’s take a look at each aspect of the definition above and I will describe how PTM supports the medical model of diagnosis and treatment.

Focus on Defects. Beneath it all, patients come to us to help make their suffering go away.  Their perception is that something is broken and not working in their lives.  The medical model focuses not just on the surface complaints, but in getting to the core defect that is causing the problems.

Kahler’s research has identified core psychological needs and existential issues correlated with each of six different personality types.  His research showed that when humans don’t get their basic psychological psychological needs met in positive ways, they attempt to get those very same needs met negatively.  These dysfunctional behaviors are frequently the cause of significant interpersonal and professional distress.  Kahler also showed that each personality type displays predictable “racket emotions,” cover up feelings that serve to mask authentic emotional expression around core issues.  While appearing legitimate on the surface, and often part of the patient’s presenting complaints, treating these racket emotions does not result in improvement.  PTM helps practitioners rapidly assess defects in how psychological needs are getting met and how authentic emotional expression is being dealt with by the patient.  Both are core drivers of dysfunctional behavior(1).

Value of thorough history, assessment, and examination.  An on-line assessment, called the Personality Pattern Inventory, yields a valid and reliable output report to aid the practitioner in diagnostic clarification and treatment planning.

PTM explains how, and under what conditions, people may experience personality changes – changes in how they are motivated and how they get negative attention.  In researching this phenomenon, called phasing, Kahler has shown that changes in personality almost always follow a period of long-term, intense distress(2).  This phenomenon and it’s dynamics give PTM high levels of postdictive validity – the ability to look back in time and explain what has happened and why.

Unlike most other models of personality, PTM personality structure has high test-retest reliability and differentiates between those aspects of our personality that remain stable over time, and those that change over time.  Each is measurable.  Furthermore, it offers specific strategies for optimum functioning.  Our patients find this extremely validating while gaining new perspective on habits of negative behavior, response to trauma, and resilience.  Knowledge of phasing also gives the practitioner a higher level of precision when conducting a history and gathering other pertinent background information.

Identification and treatment of a specific illness. Perhaps this aspect of the medical model has received the most criticism. First, most mental illnesses are multidimensional, without a single cause, and respond equally well to a variety of treatments. Only a few of the diagnoses in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV, American Psychiatric Association) have been clearly shown to have a specific biological basis and consistently respond well to specific biochemical interventions. Accumulating research over the past 20 years is showing that treatment outcomes are most strongly predicted by the alliance between patient and therapist, and patient and environmental factors(3).

Successful treatment for most mental disorders includes the following five changes for the patient: 1) insight into the causes of their suffering and consequences of their behaviors, 2) understanding of alternative choices to alleviate suffering, 3) increased confidence that they can manage their illness and improve their quality of life, 4) building and sustaining new habits of thinking, feeling, and behavior, and 5) building and sustaining healthy support networks.

PTM offers specific tools for practitioners to help patients address each of these five outcomes. I will address these five outcomes again, inserting specific PTM tools.

1.    Insight: PTM helps patients understand the interplay between their unique personality and psychological needs and the life conditions they have experienced.  They are better able to understand the difference between positive and negative psychological needs and how this affects personal and professional relationships.  By quickly identifying distorted beliefs and automatic thought patterns that contribute to a self-fulfilling prophecy(4), therapists can more effectively use approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy.  Finally, PTM helps therapists and patients apply specific tools for recognizing these patterns in daily life.
2.    Choices: PTM helps patients distinguish between positive and negative psychological needs, between authentic and racket emotions, and suggest behaviors will most likely affirm their core existential worth.
3.    Confidence: Because PTM is a language-based model of personality it offers practical tools to recognize and change how patients communicate with others and how they negotiate sabotaging self-statements and beliefs. This builds mastery and confidence.
4.    Healthy Habits: Patients can achieve immediate success in using more healthy strategies to get what they want, take care of themselves, and assert healthy boundaries. Research proves that early success in therapy predicts better outcomes down the road.
5.    Support: PTM helps patients and therapists identify what types of environments and relationships, under what conditions, will be most fulfilling, supportive, and affirming.  PTM helps clarify what strategies the patient can use to influence others and how to “inoculate” themselves against toxic people in their lives.

I’ve shown that Process Therapy Model is consistent with, and compliments the Medical Model of treatment.  Now, let’s examine how PTM transcends this old paradigm and offers a bridge to current best practices in mental health treatment.

Treatment Alliance: Treatment alliance is one of, if not the single strongest predictor of treatment outcomes.  The ability of the practitioner to quickly connect, engage and build trust with the patient is an overarching condition that makes any specific treatment intervention more successful.  PTM offers specific strategies for practitioners to identify a patient’s perceptual frame of reference and adapt their verbal and non-verbal communication accordingly.  This invites patients to feel heard and valued immediately.  Emerging research on mirror neurons and neural coupling shows that when people are “in sync” with each other, they are able to learn better, feel less anxiety, and report better sense of connection(5).  PTM teaches practitioners how to stay “in channel” with the patient, a concept similar to mirroring, but significantly more nuanced and effective.

Finally, PTM teaches practitioners how to recognize and offer patient’s psychological needs in every interaction, also improving the bond between them.  Knowing psychological needs helps the therapist and patient co-design treatment plans in a way that ensures maximum compliance and follow-through.

Channels, perceptual frames of reference, and psychological needs are tools that help practitioners individualize their approach to precisely match patient characteristics, which is far more effective than general approaches such as “mirroring” or “empathetic listening.”

Biopsychosocial systems approach: PTM helps practitioners and patients better understand the “person in environment” concept of wellness, offers strategies for patients to be active agents when interacting with their environment, and helps replace unhealthy neural pathways with more adaptive alternatives.  All of these help the patient empower themselves towards better health.

Strengths Focus: Dr. Kahler notes that PTM is about “types in people, not types of people.”  This distinction is critical because it cautions against labeling and encourages a more open and positive perspective on individual differences.  PTM outlines specific character strengths associated with each part of a person’s personality.  These strengths guide how a person finds fulfillment, contribution, and passion.  It also helps focus treatment efforts on utilizing natural strengths while building new capacities.

PTM helps validate a person’s experience while guiding a fuller expression of their natural giftedness.  We have found PTM extremely valuable when working with youth who are struggling with school, conflicting with parents, or feeling out of place in their peer group.  PTM helps to offer perspective, empathy, and validation for a person’s unique preferences for communication and gives teachers, parents, and friends the tools to better appreciate those preferences.

If you are a behavioral health practitioner and have not encountered PTM, we invite you to give it a try.  Read Kahler’s book, attend a Process Model seminar in your area, seek out practitioners who are using PTM in their work.

(1) Paul Ware, M.D. correlated personality-specific patterns of dysfunctional emotional expression and negative psychological needs with the major DSM diagnostic categories, and called these Adaptations, thus offering practitioners additional ways to make more accurate diagnoses. Adaptations are described in detail in Kahler’s book, Process Therapy Model.

(2) PTM is the only individual differences model that distinguishes between temperament and personality while also describing how people change “within” their personality.

(3) The work of Barry Duncan, including Hubble, Duncan & Miller’s book, The Heart and Soul of Change: What works in therapy, are great resources.

(4) Albert Bandura’s theory of self-efficacy outlines how a person’s confidence in their abilities is developed. In many ways, self-efficacy theory is the science behind the self-fulfilling prophecy. PTM adds further precision by showing highly predictable patterns of thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that reinforce either adaptive, or maladaptive behavior.

(5)  Stephens, G. J., Silbert, L. J., & Hasson, U. (2010). Speaker–listener neural coupling underlies successful communication. PNAS, August 10, 2010, 32: 14425-14430. In this article, the authors suggest that the frontier of this research is to identify behavioral correlates to neural coupling. PTM teaches exactly this – the behavioral cues that make up effective communication.

Here is an example of pure brilliance, and I witnessed it first hand.

Dreamer child’s mother calls and informs teacher, “I.K.” that her child is in severe distress and on her way to school.  I.K. has a group hike scheduled for the entire class first thing in the morning.

Dreamer child arrives at school at 8:30 am

What does I.K. do?

I.K., meets the child as she is walking to the classroom.  I.K. says to her, “get your book, read outside alone and come to class when you are ready.” I.K. is “wearing” his director part, being mindful to not show any emotion, and not rescue – he is aware of his tendencies to do otherwise, thanks to his Persister base and Rebel phase.

I.K., then takes the rest of the class for a hike and returns in one hour.  Leaving the Dreamer child alone.

At 10:30 I ask I.K., “How is the Dreamer child?“  His response, “She is in class, engaged, and showing no signs of distress.”

What if every teacher knew how to communicate like I.K.?  WOW!

Here is some background that I.K., little Dreamer’s mom, and the school staff were aware of:

• Child is a Dreamer base.
• The previous day, Child had to share with teachers, parents, staff and peers about a school project she was working on.
• The previous day Child also had to present to parents, staff, teachers, and peers her book that she was writing.
• Child had to respond to requests (requestive channel) from parents, staff, teachers, and peers the previous day.
• The child knew that the next morning she was expected to go on a hike – be talked to, talked at, and talk while hiking.

That day she woke up and was depleted – however  school staff, mom, and I.K. were able to give her solitude and direction.  In this situation every one learns, every one grows and no one rescues.

BRILLIANCE DEFINED.

Here are a few common themes we hear from people who are blessed with Reactor/Persister base and phase combinations:

* Having strong opinions, but tempering the expression of them in favor of harmony
* Will share their beliefs, usually when asked and when it feels safe to do so
* More likely to align with leaders who are convicted AND benevolent
* Particularly loyal and dedicated around family, friends, and close relationships. Will fiercely protect loved ones.
*Can be their own worst critics.
*Moving from normal to severe distress can cause a Jekyl/Hyde situation where they switch from a Victim Mask to an Attacker Mask or the other way around.

We invited two of our clients to illustrate through personal examples, what it’s like to have Persister/Reactor base/phase combinations. Thank you to Randy (Reactor Base/Persister Phase) and Rebecca (Persister Base/Reactor Phase) for your heartfelt and poignant stories.

Oh No. Oh No. Anthony.
by Rebecca Amis, Co-Founder, MUSE School California

When I learned my childhood friend from my adolescent years had died, I cried.  He was my sweetheart in 7th grade; he asked me to go with him – steady, that is.  And, if i recall, someone else did the asking: “Anthony wants to know if you’ll go with him?”  My answer was yes.  I think we had a very short-lived romance, less than a week.  Yet my Reactor part remembers vividly the emotions and sensory experience.

Through the years, we have stayed in touch.  We met up at our 20th high school reunion a few years ago.  I had founded a school and was living out my beliefs about how to properly educate children.   Anthony was a reporter for the New York Times, dedicating his life to honest reporting on government oppression in the Middle East.  We shared our opinions and feelings about children, education, oppression, and liberation.  My Persister base appreciated his openness to my opinions.  My Reactor phase felt valued that he still liked me for me after all these years.  We connected.

Anthony was kidnapped in Libya less than a year ago along with his photographer and other associate reporters.  He and his crew were thought to be Libyan rebels.  That was Anthony though, living out loud and determined to tell the real story of how the Libyans, the Lebanese and the Syrians were living under government oppression.  He was freed – and so many of us then held him in our thoughts hourly – sending out wishes that he be safely returned.  I cried then too.  Anthony died this month from an asthma attack as he was leaving Syria on horseback.

All weekend I have found my Persister part posting information about Anthony’s loyalty and conviction to the middle east and his dedicated storytelling.  My Reactor has appreciated the outpouring of sadness and honor which has been both beautiful and heart-wrenching.  We will all remember Anthony.  He was passionate about life.  He was a wrestler, a debater, valedictorian, a dedicated friend, a passionate and authentic writer and a man none of us will forget.  He will live on in our hearts.

To learn more about Anthony Shadid’s life and work:

http://anthonyshadid.com/

It’s Complicated
Randy Keasling, Director of Human Resources, Kidron Bethel Village

I am new to the PCM training and learning about my personality makeup has certainly been an eye opener.  Having Reactor as my base and Persister as my phase certainly offers some incredible strengths and also a great number of challenges.

I have always been able to reach people on that really personal level, connecting almost instantly to folks and being fairly perceptive of their feelings.  I have often been the type that people felt comfortable opening up to and talking to when they really need someone to listen.  My Reactor base gives me the ability to reach out to people and offer support and encouragement genuinely as it’s very important for me to know that people are “OK.”

Now, add to that my Persister phase and the picture is much more complicated.  One minute I am reaching out to someone, the next minute my drive and determination kicks in and I am hyper focused and the person I just worked so hard to comfort and connect with could walk right by me and I might not even know they are there.  I can go from Reactor to Persister in lightning speed and as a result of the PCM training I am learning what that must be like for those around me.

I have always known that I seemed to have the capacity to say hurtful things, often without knowing or realizing what I did exactly and now, having been through the PCM training, I realize that folks see my Reactor side which is very approachable and caring and the next minute they might get a glimpse of my Persister phase which can certainly come across very harsh and cold and it’s hard for them understand “what happened.”

I really am aware now of the personal struggle of balancing my base and phase, caring deeply about people and their feelings yet having deep passionate beliefs and ideas about things that I see as important.  I have often given up what’s important to me in an effort to “keep the peace” and not upset someone and then I have often driven people away by crusading about things that I feel so strongly about.  Try visualizing a teeter totter and it feels like I am on both ends.

Being aware, of any issues is the first step toward dealing with and making sense of that issue.  Having gone through the PCM training, I am now aware of these aspects of who I am and being aware, I work daily to make sense of it and to temper both my base and phase, working on not being too passive in my Reactor base but yet not too harsh and cold in my Persister phase.  It is a challenge and struggle daily but I have made much progress with the knowledge gained from the training and feel each day like those dual aspects of my personality are coming a little more together all the time.

“It’s all good” I like to say and there are no wrong personality types.  My make up certainly offers many challenges but a great number of strengths as well and while I am far from mastering it, I work daily to be self aware and to build strong channels of communication with the people I come in contact with.  Knowledge is power and we can all work to use the individual strengths we have to build bridges instead of walls!  Good luck to you as you work on building your own bridges!

In my blog titled “Taking People at Face Value,” I urged you to respond to what was right in front of you as a way to ensure the best possible communication.  Now, I’m taking it one step further – to the challenge of accountability.

Accountability is about follow through.  Doing what you say you will do, finishing what you start.  At the most basic level, accountability boils down to motive, or intention.  Intention that is made overt, aligned with desires, and acted upon results in accountability.

Accountability falls apart when intentions are not dealt with appropriately:

• when competing intentions hijack desired outcomes;
• when an intention to follow through is assumed instead of clarified;
• when ulterior intentions are assumed;
• when real intentions are held secret.

Closing channels holds others accountable.
Closing channels is one of the most powerful ways to clarify intentions, and make overt the ulterior motives that can interfere with accountability.  And, it sends the message to others that they can count on you to respond to the best intentions.  Each channel has only one true/best intention behind it.

 Channel               Motive/Intention
Emotive                 To play and accept unconditionally
Nurturative           To care without strings attached
Requestive            To ask without expectations
Directive                To command without attack

When you close a channel enthusiastically, authentically, and sincerely – using all five behavioral cues for the complimenting part, you accept, and therefore make overt the best and true intention of that channel.  No guesswork.  No assumptions.  No ulterior motives.

For example, your partner opens the Nurturative Channel with “I love you.”  You close with a sincere and appreciative “Thank you!” using all five behavioral cues.  By closing the channel, you lift up the intention of caring without strings attached.  If this was not the other person’s intention, their bluff has been called by your response.  You have sent the process message, “If you use this channel, I will count on you to follow through with caring – taking you at face value.  If this is not your intention, don’t use this channel with me.”

The key message: Close channels. Be consistent, be authentic, take people at face value, and you will raise accountability with all those around you.

Learn how to open and close channels with all personality types by attending a Next Element Process Communication Model Seminar.

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